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Heartache changes us for the better or the bitter.

Life delivers a fair share of disappointment, loss, and pain. It’s unavoidable. No matter how hard we try to skirt discomfort, into each life, a little heartache will fall. We run the gauntlet facing a myriad of displeasure, and when we make it to the other side of that battering, we lift our heads and reflect upon all we endured. We face a defining moment: we ask ourselves, “Am I better for it or bitter?”

May Pain Not Cloud Our Way

May pain not cloud our way. Sometimes overwhelming pain leaves us groping through the darkness. The fog of our discontent keeps us from seeing those glimmers of light which show up as an encouraging reminder that we will get through this tsunami—these glimmers of light fuel our hope. Heartache creeps in and sucks the life from us. If we’re not careful, it leaves us in despair, losing hope that nothing about our circumstances will change.

We Can’t Wish or Pray Heartache Away

As hard as we may try, we can’t wish away heartache, and we can’t pray it away either. We just gotta go through it until we reach safe harbor. When will we make it to the shores of contentment? No one knows. It just happens. One day we’ll notice our up-close Companion of Pain has mosied over and ceased to walk in lockstep with us. What a relief!

Heartache Changes Us

Heartache changes us for the better or the bitter. When the challenges of life pounce on us and dash our hopes with woe, we retain the privilege of choice. We determine our outcome. Now, this sounds all cavalier, I know. It’s easy to declare this when we’re not in the clutches of sorrow. Yet, what becomes of us when we do face dark adversity? In the darkness, we decide, no matter how difficult, to listen for that faint whisper and look for that snapshot flash that invaded the darkness surrounding us to ignite us with a bit more hope. I believe these experiences appear so that we don’t give up.

Better, Not Bitter

Trying times and circumstances come to us all. Who wants to endure something heartbreaking just to remain irrevocably damaged? Since the sum total of our lives encounters some heartache, we gotta figure out how to walk away with some gains, some wins, so that we stand up better. We don’t want to live bowed, broken, and bitter. I read an article on LinkedIn from a young woman battling cancer, and she said, “Live like you’re living. Because today you are.” With all that she’s facing, she decided to live, to show up better because of what she’s enduring. 


I’ve watched so many of my loved ones and close family friends devastated at the passing of our loved ones. The struggle is real, nightmarish even; yet, I witness each day as one of them fights her way through. Some are oh so bitter, but they don’t want to remain in that state. Some are barely better, but they affirm every day and throughout the day that the journey has become easier through prayer and encouragement from others. I don’t know of anyone who’s totally better, but we’re all looking for better days, better mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical health. 

Forever Changed

Yes, heartache changes us. May not our pain cloud our way, for we long for better within ourselves. It sounds cliche, “Bad days don’t last always, but strong people do.” Strong people don’t pop up from out of nowhere. These discerning ones keep their wits about them, even through heartache. They’re looking for any sign of a word or a song or an image or an embrace to remind themselves that they will make it out of the darkness of heartache. They will make it out better and be able to help somebody else make it too. We hope, in days to come, that we continue to change for the better.

 Better Together

Join us as we discuss serious matters of the heart. Leave only your contact info on the upper portion of the Contact Us form at yourlaststory.com/contact. However, complete the form if you want help writing a last story or life tribute.

Live Long and Prosper

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